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There’s nothing like an indecisive orderer. In my world you’re supposed to know what you want BEFORE you sit down. But restaurant clairvoyance doesn’t come easy to most folks so I ease the burden by never insisting that Miss A make a menu decision. Oh I’ve tried pleading, begging and beseeching, indeed ENTREATING her to order anything she wants. And it never works.

When we’re at Bergin’s Café and Pastry shop, which is often these days, our conversation usually goes something like this:

Me: Whadaya want?

Her: I dunno?

Me: You know the croissants here are the best in town.

Her: That sounds nice…what do YOU want?

Me: I don’t care…how about a root vegetable quiche, scramble eggs with matzo and brie, some scones, a piping hot bowl of oatmeal—piping hot being what bowls of oatmeal always are-- and a cinnamon roll?

Her: But you always have that…

Me: Okay, then you order.

Her: That’s fine…uh..what sounds good to you…?

And so it goes. I invariably end up ordering for both of us… and as you can tell, at Bergin’s things can get really bad…but that’s only because the food is sooooo good.

The best thing about Bergin’s—besides the breads, the fruit tarts, the muffins, and the sandwiches, is Mary. She’s a world-class pastry chef and we’re lucky to have her in our own backyard. Her baked goods are the best I’ve tasted this side of the La Brea Bakery in L.A. and her cozy little café gives west-siders a first class breakfast venue…and the only off-strip restaurant in town where everything is baked on premises by the dessert chef that made Spago famous. I’ve eaten just about everything on the limited menu—at breakfast at least—and there’s not a clinker in the bunch.

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Lunches aren’t bad either, with only the boring Portabello sandwich being a dud…but I confess that I find anything made with these giant fungi to be tedious and tasteless. That doesn’t mean I don’t order it on occasion, …but supping on these non-scrumptuous ‘shrooms is never my idea…or is it??????

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