It’s Brian B. The bookstore dude gave me your email. I was at your reading the other night. I was wearing a bright orange shirt and a Firebird Lounge cap. Remember? We spoke about chickens. At one point you said you raised exotic poultry in Australia. That really stuck with me. You don’t seem like a poultry kind of guy.
So, listen. I have an idea for a horror film about chicken farming, and you being a writer, I wonder if you would be interested in helping me write the script. I’m not a writer, I’m an Ideas Guy. I was thinking something like $250. I’d love to pay more but my medication keeps going up in price, and after the infection, I have to be careful.
It’s a really great story about mutant chickens — or chickens that become mutations when the hormones kick in. I can’t say more until I get you to sign a confidentiality agreement, but I know you’ll love it for sure.
I really hope you can call me back soon. I’m at the Firebird or Teeters pretty much every day, except tomorrow when I’m getting the broken tooth fixed. But I’ve got $250 burning a hole in my pocket for you. I know that once you hear the plot you’ll want to bang out a script and send it to your agent toot sweet. I feel the beginning of a great partnership.